Steel Blue Hearts
by Kanon The Great
Summary: As Valentines Day approaches, a girl is reminded of the pain a servant caused. But she also learns that pain can be another form of something much more deep. Something so deep she doesn't even remember how the words go. I may add parts but for now its a oneshot. Bernkastel x Kanon. Rated T for now.


A month ago, a little girl and a servant sat on a beach to watch the sun set. The girl grew bored and killed the servant.

Unlike her previous episodes, she knew her sin.

But she was afraid to admit the truth. The more she thought of it, the more she remembered… And when she remembered, she grew more and more scared. The thought of emptiness, the thought of that same pain that no one told her when to run from would catch up to her again and again. She wishes that she could kiss his lips and make him feel special, but she just couldn't.

That was her biggest tragedy.

The lady in pink, at least she could understand the same pain she went through. Together they always were able to fight off that pain they shared, or place the burden on millions of chess pieces and thousands of fragments. The sweet odor of her partner lusted all her thoughts away. She had become Comfortably Numb..

The girl who continued to sob to try and run away from the pain that she was chasing, only flew further and further from solutions. She could only think of one now. Who was that person.. that servant she killed and managed to actually forgive… no… who made her forgive herself. How dare that furniture do that..

Furniture would always be worthless… always just another brick in the wall. Or if that wall was just the surface modeled into a chess piece. Just a tiny brick in that huge vessel, was just a pawn inside her hand. She could crush him like a bug, watch his insides bleed like jelly coming out from one of those French Pastries her lady Lambdadelta would give her. While she didn't like them.. It was from her. That was who she wanted, only her. Lambda.

She needed to erase all thoughts of that boy from her head. Before it killed her from the inside. She didn't ever want to become a piece again. Poor girl.. lost in that dark forest of despair. How I wish you find your way out~

The servant turned his attention to the cloudy sky. The outside world covered by a dark blanket of ominous warnings made of fluff. The sun still shone from an opening; perhaps the Saint Valentine refused to be bothered by clouds. At least there was two things in the sky. What a poor servant. He hadn't even finished after two hours of work in the steel blue bluebells. What a poor servant. He hadn't finished what he wanted a month ago. What a poor servant. A feeling of loneliness is worst than being alone when it struggles like this for so long. How we all feel for you young servant.

A girl appeared, a haze of blue butterflies flew from the blue bluebells to her. Low and behold it was that same girl from a month ago. A sad ecstasy spun around the petals in this courtyard.

The girl in a blue Lolita dress, and a black and indigo parasol, with black round high heeled shoes and the tail of a kitten with a bow on her strode toward the servant, almost inhuman like a demon, but as graceful as an angel. She waved her cattail, a sauceful of secrets in her mind. The servant knew that. But she couldn't possibly mean any harm. That is until he remembered what this little girl could do. She had indeed killed her brutally. Seems like it was a pattern, either girls died in front of her, or girls would be killing him. Poor servant. You could never get a break from all this anguished pain. You should be the one Comfortably Numb.

After hundreds of thoughts like kakeras and cat-boxes, she raised her mouth wanting to speak looking into his eyes. She hid her fear.

The girl was conflicted in how she would end his miserable life to make her life cured from the possibility of boredom. That one thing she could never live with. Would it be worth for her to kill him slowly, to watch his insides turn to liquid. With all the pain, it would rid a lot of time, but if she felt bad afterwards, even if the possibility was near zero, she would stay like this forever, and in even more anguish than before. However, if she were to kill him quickly, what if there was no satisfaction? What if it wouldn't do any good, if she were to remain in hell for all eternity? But she would never have to hear or see him again. Oh how joyful would it be. What will you chose little one~? Speak up… and then we shall see.

All that thought went on in a second. And in half that time, as if that dimension stopped to allow her seven years to make such a decision, she finally raised her mouth again. It formed a smirk, a wicked sly smirk. It was her way of saying, "You're going to die~". The servant knew that all to well, and in a millisecond tried to turn, but at that time the girl had pulled out her scythe.

Playtime, was coming

The servant could only watch now, he had given up to soon. Poor servant. You missed the starting gun.

She began raising her scythe. When something flashed into her eyes. This was the same person, who actually made her happy. What was it that made her happy. Happy in a human sense; To make this girl happy would take an utter miracle. She was no human that could be taken lightly as to simply be happy from a blue sky. She couldn't even tell Blue skies from pain anymore. She would never be happy. But then what was this feeling? But to a humans view, she was happy to their concept of happiness. Then what would that equal you might ask. A different type of Curiosity tortured her now. She searched her mind to see what had happened one month ago..

"It was a kiss…" she finally realized and her eyes widened looking down at the servant who was on his knees praying to whoever was out there to help. She sighed and needed to get this out of her system. But he couldn't understand now what she was thinking. He remembered the psychotic hypocrisy she had committed to him. He began to tear up, all this within three seconds, quite amazing.

She looked down at her eye to eye, both honestly equally scared on what they were doing. She knew that what she was about to do might as well change her life from okay to suicide by crazy diamonds. She moved in ever so slowly. Resistance. Fortitude. Lust. Fear.

Finally, after what seemed like two eternities, she leaned in and then locked her lips with him. This was what made her "Happy"? Was it that one thing she could never understand? Was it something deeper than anything she had known? More than to wonder if God was watching her, more than if her world was constantly growing? She should know these answers, but some burning feeling, something so old in her that she couldn't remember the words to the song it was about. Her lips tingled, and she felt a warm feeling near her sides, the servant held her head and had also leaned in. Somehow she let him do this, as if she wasn't afraid or angered. She began moving her tongue and slowly moved her hand on the servants shoulders and tilted her head. She finally remembered this feeling. She had never experienced this with the Lady Lambdadelta. That was a song named lust every time they kissed. Their kisses were sloppy. This kiss had passion, like a mother and her child. Something that deep only meant one thing. Love. Love was what she had felt.

This Girl, she despised it, partly because she could never understand love. It was something of fantasy to her. Ambrosia, something that didn't exist in her land as far as she knew of; but never did anything say Ambrosia could be created.

If that was the case, something she didn't believe in, and something she hated more than boredom. She had created Ambrosia, out when the possibilities were at zero. It was, another miracle. A miracle that though only seconds long, was something she felt more proud of than any victory in a game, or any satisfaction from a climax of sweat and chess pieces captured. If this was chess, she had captured the King in one move.

The Girl finally let go and looked at the servant straight into his eyes. She couldn't help herself by lean in for another taste. He felt amazing. She did too. He felt ecstatic. She was Prodigal to him. She was lost, and now she had been found. As if by his own luck or miracle…

The servant, Kanon, let go and began to pant. It felt like one month had gone by like the speed of light. Nothing had changed, you see. On that beach, on that special sunset, it was the two. The servant and the girl that found love, and while they had lost it before. The girl, Bernkastel began to grasp on what something impossible was and how it could become possible. Whether or not she believed that it was a miracle, or some fake feeling of righteousness. She couldn't help but admit defeat over the powers of passion. So with one breath she looked at her boyfriend right in the eyes and said at last.

"Je t'aime, tellement… Kanon" Which in French means "I love you, so much..."

The two of them, even with so little words read their thoughts in their minds so perfectly. Only lovers could do that. Even though they didn't know eachother that well. At least, they had a story to be told. She pushed Kanon onto a field of bluebells and got onto him and hugged him tight, then kissed him again. He replied by caressing her soft dress and didn't mind the tickles of the flowers. Desire took over, and they lied down next to eachother. The Girl and The Servant, poor nevermore.


End file.
